In my first year of graduate training I learned quite a bit more about hands. We would be video-ed weekly, and got plenty of comments of our supervisors how we came over, the sitting positions, hands, feet, face. Everything had to look as "neutral" as possible. One of my favorite hand positions for the counseling room is to fold my hands into each other.
In my life outside that room my hands are seldom at rest. A reminder came some weeks ago, when my brother emailed me "...it made me think of you when you were drawing so much in your teens..."
I thought he should see me now! My hands are busier than ever, not only with drawing, but also painting, knitting, crocheting, making jewelry, and so on.
This mixed media work was done about 12 years ago, when "oversized anything" was in vogue. Notice the wedding ring on the left hand? When living in Holland, I wore the ring on my right hand, because that's where Protestant people who are married, wear their wedding ring.
If one was Catholic, one wore it on the opposite side. (Commonly, the engagement ring moved to the other hand when one got married.)
So the more subtle question to ask if you wanted to know if someone was married or not, was to inquire, "Are you Protestant or Catholic?"
In the seventies most women in the Netherlands had a simple wedding band. Sometimes with a tiny diamond in it, but never the extravagant two rings fitting into each other, now common in the USA.
Two years ago, I noticed to my chagrin that in the new church we attended, people were looking at my ring. At first I reasoned that I had been living more than fifteen years in the States, and was not planning to change anything on my appearance.
But as time went by, these looks from men as well as women became too distracting. I could see their pondering or confusion. Hmm, she keeps coming with the same guy. But why doesn't she have a wedding ring on?
So, one time I had enough of it, and told to my husband, "I need a ring."
Not, I want a ring, or I like a ring for my birthday. No, "I need..."
I know that was not very romantic!!
Hubby looked very surprised, so I told him why.
He did not say anything that I can remember.
A few weeks later, we were visiting one of our kids, and we were shopping in Old Town.
When we passed a Russian jewelry store, I suddenly remembered my conversation with hubby. Because the ring in itself was not an important thing to me, I had forgotten all about it!
I saw a ring I liked, but I did not expect hubby to like it, or to immediately give in to an extravagant expense.
My jaw dropped when all he said was, "okay," and went to the cash register to pay for it! Without any protest, or joke "that is then your birthday gift" (it was not near by birthday).
I was so dumbfounded and confused that when leaving the store, I carried the little handbag with the box in it. My daughter demanded, "Aren't you going to wear it?"
(Sorry, it's not very visible that these are two rings, but if you want "proof" then click on the image to enlarge.)
"Uh, uh..mmm....I have to get used to the idea."
" Well, you get used to the idea, by wearing it!" said little Smarty Pants, and had a big grin on her face, when in the middle of the street, I finally opened the box and put "it" on.
"It" is a pain to wear, or rather, all the times you have to take it off, when you wash the dishes, when I paint, or when I knit, my yarn gets stuck in it, and so on, and so forth.
Can't I just go back to my simple wedding ring? Don't tell me...
I remember now why I started wearing it.