Pages

To live and enjoy every day to its fullest, use my gifts to help others, I travel to wherever passion finds me.

What Will She Paint?

So many friends I met here...!

Friday, August 13, 2010

MUSINGS ABOUT UNLIKELY FRIENDSHIPS

Since I started blogging, I was skeptical that it would bring me genuine friends. After all, one can only experience part of the person. Also, because a blog is a public place, one needs to keep some things private because of hackers. But the things we had in common made us  try to get together since last year. And not too long ago  I could get away and meet her. On one hand it was meeting someone for the first time, but the blog gave us so much to talk about  that it was like meeting an old friend.

Even though she is a business person, she also has some strong artistic sides. Some time ago she sent me this large angel wing you see above. She felt "it was for me." On that blog I started an artist group, and for that group endeavor I once made a poem. She added on to that. 

© In process "Safe from the storm" St.Germain

Whatever I would do with her drawing was fine with her. At the conference a few posts before, I decided to take her idea and develop it my own way - I'm still half way in the process, but you catch the drift of it.


Then one time she sent me an email about an emergency. I couldn't believe that I was the "right" friend for her situation, knowing exactly what to do. 
I went into "psychologist mode" and started urging her to do  step 1, 2 , 3, and 4, because she was in an acute kind of danger that she didn't know about. 
It has been a long haul, and she is still adjusting, but I heard at our meet that what I told her fits in with what others had advised her. 
Even though the content of our talk was very serious, I could tell she was very excited, because  she wrote me three emails that same day. Sometimes a friend is just someone "being there and being present."


MY MUSINGS 
Now I think about it, that is the difference between a medical doctor, who is expected to fix immediately what is broken or not working, and a psychologist. Many times I have heard variations of "if you had not been there...." Some authors who write about therapy have called this "containing the patient." It simply means that the therapist is an emotional container for anger, depression, hallucinations, etc.. 
Can talking about it, do all of that? 
Don't people need a little more than that? 
It depends...they may need medication for some time, but that does not heal emotional wounds. Someone traveling by your side, and encouraging till you have crossed those deep or dark places, makes the journey bearable and doable. 
I love to do that till they say they see the light at the end of the tunnel!

9 comments:

DawnTreader said...

I still have not met any of my blogging friends. And yet there are one, two, three, even more... of whom I think now: "if you had not been there..." I would not know how exactly to continue that sentence, but life would have been different.

Vicki Lane said...

I've met in person some of my blogging friends and it's been such a delight! I haven't been disappointed yet.

Twain12 said...

i'm still new to this blogging world and don't share that much, but i do feel drawn to certain people and i thing we can sense when we find people that we have a connection with

DUTA said...

How interesting! Meeting a blogging friend and helping her overcome some psychological issue.

This encounter has probably given you a new perspective on the bloggie world which many consider it as not real, but virtual only.

young-eclectic-encounters said...

How wonderful to meet one of your blogging friends and I think that blogging friends come in all different levels of closeness just like the people we interact with in person. There has been many a time when a comment will make my day from my blog. Some of those who follow my blog are family and friends from where I live now and old friends that I had lost tract of all the way back to my childhood and then there are my new friends from all over the world who check on me and help make make my life better, you included. Have a nice weekend and thanks for your comments. Johnina :^A

ANNA-LYS said...

I think that encounters like Yours are the best, because they are without heavy socio-historical shared memories or expectations, it is "in situ" here and now, which makes it intense and focused on the problem at hand. It should stay that way and not be developed further (due to the risk of being emotional utilized).

Lovely, thanks for sharing!

jeannette said...

Monika,
For you it would probably not be as likely to meet fellow bloggers, since yo don't travel much. But it sounds like you're saying that some have made an impact on you:)

Vicky Lane,
Wow, you have met several...that's great!

Twain,
Hope that you'll have the experience sometime to meet one of the bloggers:)

Duta,
This can only be done with strong individuals - it would be way too risky with other types of problems.
Am still cautious. I would not want to do therapy on line (as some do, because I miss 75% of their (non-verbal) behavior.

Johnina,
You are welcome, Friend! Am happy for you that blogging benefits you so much:)

Anna-Lys,
Thank you, friend! Actually, in my job I like to do long-term therapy, but if I have only a small window of time, I still like to help if I can.

susanna said...

Yes, the blogosphere is a great place to meet people AND to make good friends.

And yes, I am glad that there are people like you out there, helping those in need, even if it's just to listen. It seems that most of us are in such a hurry in our lives that we, and I include myself when I write this, don't perhaps listen as much as we should.

jeannette said...

Susanna,
So true, listening can be challenging in a busy world. And, good listening is a skill acquired by practice:)
Have a great week, Susanna!